Tom’s foot with one sad toe (by Benjamin)
Our local alternative weekly newspaper, the Mountain Xpress, has a feature called Blog Log, where reporter Brian Postelle chooses certain local blogs and a particular post on those blogs to highlight for the week. My blog’s been chosen several times, and I’ve got to tell you—it makes me inordinately happy. Perhaps I’m a little silly, but it’s really nice to be recognized, however modest the fame may be. It is particularly gratifying because, although we have a very active blogging community in the area, I don’t really fit with the general blogging crowd here. I’m sure they’re all very nice, but they are a hip, savvy, and trendy crowd. And I…well…I am not. So I don’t fit in.
Anyway, it’s been a while since Brian mentioned Blue Ridge Blue Collar Girl on Blog Log, and it’s got me a little down in the dumps. The truth is, the only posts of mine he seems to like are the funny posts. And, well, these days I’m feeling about as funny as fire ants at a picnic. As funny as a big zit on prom night. As funny as screen doors on a submarine. You get the idea.
Because Blue Ridge Blue Collar Man and I have been a little anxious lately. Big cuts are being made where he works, and he is still classified as a “temporary” worker. He is also the most recently hired. So we’re feeling a mite vulnerable. Plus, they’ve cut his $12/hour pay and gone way up on our insurance, while our benefits have been sharply reduced. So we got the poor-boy-beans-for-supper-again blues, and I just don’t feel like being funny.
So here’s where you will see me shamelessly exploit Blue Ridge Blue Collar Man just so I can maybe be in Blog Log again. You see, Brian Postelle also has a fascination for blogger injury stories. He said so himself here. And I offer as proof the fact that he featured my post about the time Blue Ridge Blue Collar Man stopped bleeding with a condiment, not one, but two times on Blog Log. So here I present the sad, sad story of Blue Ridge Blue Collar Man and his tragic toe injury:
Since Blue Ridge Blue Collar Man works as a maintenance man, I worry a right good bit about his safety. He has a lot of roof leak experience, so he’s the man they turn to when there’s a persistent leak. So he spends a lot of time on ladders and roofs (I always want to say “rooves.”) He likes it up there, but it makes me nervous, especially considering our luck for the past twenty years.
So it finally happened—he got hurt about a month ago. But it wasn’t falling off a roof. Nope, so often it’s the little things that trip you up—in this case, an extension cord that he tripped over. He then, in regaining his balance, managed to somehow come down hard on his toe and sprained it badly. He came home limping like Grandpappy Amos on The Real McCoys. (Does anybody else remember that show?) When he showed me his toe, I got that weird chest-tightening I only get when someone I love hurts themselves. It was one ugly digit, let me tell you. Completely black—almost gangrenous looking—like his toe was going to wither and fall off in a matter of days.
And, unfortunately, he is afraid to take time off from work (See Paragraph 3 above). So he’s been gimping about for a while now, and while he’s some better (and his toe is unwithered and firmly attached), it still hurts quite a lot. So, really, I’m not just posting this to get on Blog Log. Certainly not. I’d truly be grateful if anybody has some ideas to help a seriously-sprained toe.
But…there is no escaping the fact that I’m shamelessly exploiting my husband’s injury and milking it for all it’s worth just to see my name in print. I’m kind of like that kid in grade school who was always raising their hand and waving it frantically to be recognized. Desperate, I tell you. Heck, I’d even resort to excessive flattery to see my name in print. And it’s not even my real name. That’s the saddest thing. I mean, my name isn’t really Blue Ridge Blue Collar Girl, of course. It’s Beth, with a “B”. Like Brian, with a “B”. As in, Brian Postelle, the very fine reporter and creator of the entertaining and delightful Blog Log in that most outstanding and venerable newspaper, the Mountain Xpress.
That’s Beth. With a “B”. As in blog. As in bold and brazen. As in Blue Ridge Blue Collar Girl.