Wide-Eyed Wonder at the Wii We Won

 

If you want to see this better, click on it to enlarge it.

(The cartoon above was created by my daughter Ariel aka Lucky Pennies in Microsoft Paint.  Now, in case you were thinking, Gosh, that seems kind of mean, well, let me explain.  The truth is—I have a large fanny.  (Or Gluteus Maximus, if you prefer, with emphasis on the Maximus).   That’s just the way it is, no ifs, ands, or…um…buts about it.   There’s no getting around it.  (I mean, reallythere’s no getting around it).  So, like Steve Martin making jokes about his huge nose (in one of my favorite movies, Roxanne, a hilarious retelling of Cyrano de Bergerac), I’ve always made jokes about my big rear end.  Might as well laugh, because there’s not a darn thing I can do about it.   So my family has always been given license to poke gentle and affectionate fun at my derriere.  And, yes, they’re laughing with me, not at me.  Really, they’ve always been the first ones to boost my confidence by telling me I’m pretty.  So, I really don’t mind being the…er…butt of their jokes.)

 

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Recently I heard yet another story about an Idaho man who won big, not just one—but three times—in the state lottery.  I always roll my eyes and sigh when I hear those stories because, although I’ve entered any number of contests in my life, I’ve rarely won a thing. 

 

Okay, there was that dozen eggs in the PTA raffle I won when I was six years old.  When they called my name, I was nearly beside myself with rapture.  I ran up to collect my dozen eggs, then in my excitement, almost tripped and dropped the eggs on the way back to my seat.   Yes, you read that right—I was practically apoplectic with ecstasy upon winning a dozen eggs.   Sad, but true.

 

So you can imagine my excitement recently when my daughter Ariel called me with some exciting news:   She had won a dozen eggs!    No, no…I’m just kidding.  Actually, she had won a prize for writing the best definition of “health” at a…what else…health fair at college.  She had won….drum roll, please…a Wii!  And a Wii Fit! 

 

Yes, it’s true!  She broke the family, never-win-anything curse!  Even better, she brought the Wii home for fall break.  I’d like to tell you that we spent her break communing in nature, discussing deep and profound philosophical insights, feeling one with the universe and all mankind.  I’d like to, but I can’t.  Because the truth is, when we weren’t out running errands or shopping for things she needed, we were one with our Wii.  (Now for any one that might not know, it’s pronounced  “wee” and don’t feel bad if you didn’t know because, a year ago, I didn’t either.  I pronounced it “why”).

 

And, oh my, this Wii is just way too much fun. To start with, it was a blast to make the little Beth Mii character (of course, pronounced “Me.”)  I could make my Mii as pretty and thin as I wanted to!  Never mind that later, after the Wii Fit had weighed me and done my “fitness evaluation,” that the Wii made my Mii fatter.  At least my Mii still had that gorgeous hair!  Yes, that’s right—the Wii Fit, after it weighs you, will actually change your Mii’s size to match reality.  That just amazes me.  Sure, it annoys me a little, too, but mostly…it amazes me.  Ariel and I made some more little Mii’s—she made Oprah Winfrey and Bill Clinton and I made an Obama Mii.   He was really cute.

 

Anyway, Ariel went back to college Sunday and took her Wii with her.   Good thing, too, because if she had left it here, you wouldn’t be reading this post because I wouldn’t have written it because I would still be playing that river bubble game where you float down the river in a giant bubble trying to get to the end, which only happens if you don’t burst your bubble on the rocks or if the bee doesn’t puncture your bubble with its stinger, thus drowning your little Mii.  Sadly, my Mii was drowned repeatedly, which, I can assure you, is most unpleasant. 

 

Yep, no doubt about it—I am a woman obsessed.   I have a wiikness for Wii, and the only cure is to get one myself or have counseling.  Or possibly I could exert my parental authority and tell Ariel of my grave concerns that the Wii might be too much of a distraction from her college coursework, so, regretfully, her father and I think it might be best if she left it here (I would say this, of course, with great gravitas, shaking my head sadly). Or perhaps I could rationalize buying a Wii for Mii—after all the Wii Fit provides obvious health benefits by encouraging people to exercise.  Yeah, that’s the ticket.  We need a Wii  ’cause it’s good for me!  Who knows… maybe it could do something for my big backside—tone my tush, give definition to my derriere…

 

Or…maybe not.  That’s probably just a little too much to ask.  :-)  

 

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(I sincerely apologize for the small print.  I have no idea why it came out that way.  I tried to change it, but it wouldn’t let me.  I’m sorry!)

 

 

 

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11 Responses to “Wide-Eyed Wonder at the Wii We Won”

  1. Pat Says:

    Always great to start out the day with a post of yours that leaves me smiling…chuckled almost as much about the Wii as I did about the ticks!

  2. Judy Says:

    This is so funny and I love your sense of humor. Sounds like the Wii is something we might like. Your puns still crack me up. I spent all afternoon yesterday trying to get my blog to have everything underlined in a post I was working on. It seems blogs are doing strange things these days. Do you think they might be cursed by Halloween????????

  3. Judy Says:

    Me again. I meant to say everything in my post was underlined and I could not get the lines removed. See, it changed my comment!!!

  4. June Says:

    I’ve played golf with a Wii…they are addictive! I’ve seen a bowling Wii used in a nursing home…which I thought was wonderful. As for winning things…I used to win enough to make me feel pretty lucky when it comes to those sorts of things, but it’s been a long while since I’ve won anything. I always think it a bit unfair when the same person wins the lotto three times…I mean come on…spread the wealth around! Oops, I guess I must be a socialist :-)

  5. pticester Says:

    You should probably use your best parental tone with your daughter – but then we’d miss your posts.

    We don’t have a Wii, but I’m not sure I could take seeing my body onscreen!

  6. Clara Melvin Says:

    Oh Beth, that was so funny. My grandsons are here with me and they have a Wii. I read your post out loud to them and they cracked up. I have played with their Wii. ( it looks like any one who could put a man on the moon could come up with a better name) Every time I call Ryan, I say, “What are you doing, playing with your Wii?” I would also like to have one, but before I get one, I want a big screen TV….so I can really see my tush :) Thanks Beth for the laugh!

  7. marion Says:

    This past summer, I stayed with my grown daughter up in northern Maine. My 16-year old grandaughter and her BF baffled me as they stood together in the living room, making soundless motions. Since I found him a bit different (very, very tall and flowing blonde hair he could SIT on, and both of them hanging around in flannel PJ bottoms all the time & wearing thick socks) I wondered if this might be some kind of new age ritual. Silent, waving motions.
    Well, you guessed it…it was a Wii. I’d heard of the Wii, but never seen it used. They somehow preferred no sound. Too funny~
    The Wii Fit sounds interesting. Maybe I’ll ask Santa for one…

  8. Jeff Says:

    Oh, so funny!! Now, just to show you how out of touch I am, what is a “Wii”? I know I could look it up on the Internet, but I thought I’d make folks amazed that someone actually doesn’t know what one is. Obviously, I have no children, but what else? I don’t have a TV, either. I’m so culturally deprived! …. LOL.

  9. luckypennies Says:

    Haha, you can’t pull the parental concern one with me now…I’ve been so busy and responsible that I haven’t still haven’t even unpacked it yet! Even though some of my friends were trying to bully me into it today. I even stood up to peer pressure. Aren’t you proud of me?

    And I just want to say that I’m going to beat the bubble game before you. And the penguin one. Hahahahahaha!!!!

    Seriously, every time I explain to someone how I won it, I’m shocked. I’m so blessed. Speaking of winning, I won the Conner Art Contest with my linocut. I took best in show. I’m just tickled pink! I thought I’d let you know.

    I agree that Wii is a pretty awkward name. For what it’s worth, Jeff, a Wii is a Nintendo video gaming system that uses a movement-sensitive control to move characters and play sports and games. It’s pretty cool and high-tech. And you’re not that out of the loop. I wouldn’t know that much about it either if I didn’t own one now. :D

  10. Benjamin Says:

    This cracks me up. I still have as of yet to get my hands on a Wii controller. No time for it in college, no sirree. :-P

  11. CountryDew Says:

    I enjoy my Wii but I don’t yet have the WiiFit. It’s on my wish list.

    Glad you had a chance to play.

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